Hospice, Dusty and C.S. Lewis

Dusty & Me - Spring 2000
How does a parent "prepare" for the loss of a child? No matter the age, whether old or young, a child is quite literally a part of you. Even with all the support in the world, there is no guidebook on how to begin an end. There are no instructions for how to go on in the aftermath of good-bye. Fear... of what feels like an impending amputation. Fear... of losing a tangible life that laughs, cries, loves. Sometimes C.S. Lewis words about his wife Helen Joy, run through my mind. Words that articulate what so many have felt. The same words words that articulate what I try every day to delay...


"Slowly, quietly, like snow-flakes – like the small flakes that come when it is going to snow all night – little flakes of me, my impressions, my selections, are settling down on the image of her. The real shape will be quite hidden in the end. Ten minutes – ten seconds – of the real her would correct all this. And yet, even if those ten seconds were allowed me, one second later the little flakes would begin to fall again. The rough, sharp, cleansing tang of her otherness is gone." C.S. Lewis"  A Grief Observed


Even still, I try to remind myself that "Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain!"  ~ Kathie